Our thoughts and actions are motivated by one or the other general attitude. There are two fundamental attitudes towards life. The first is the defensive attitude, the second is the open attitude. The defensive attitude is basically influenced by fear, the open attitude by the absence of fear. Since we all have fears and only very few people can be said to be totally free of it, we can hardly state that our attitude is hundred percent defensive or hundred percent open. That is why I am talking about our predominant attitude.
The question if our attitude is predominantly defensive or predominantly open is easily seen in relationships, the way we relate to other people. Relating to others, however, first and foremost depends on how we relate to ourselves. Are we open to our inner voices, do we accept that we have fears and inferiority complexes? Do we listen to the signs that point to them, for example in our dreams?
If we do, we probably have an open attitude. If we close our eyes and repress our fears or obsessions, or thought that we consider perverse, for example, if we put some moralistic stigma on them and tell us that we better forget them, we are predominantly defensive.
To be defensive means that we open our eyes only partly and thus see a stripe of life, but not the whole spectrum of it. In a relationship, for example, if listening to another’s problems and strains gets us confused or upset, or even suffocates us, we are deeply involved with our own repressed feelings and desires, and this because we are defensive. We can’t be open to ourselves and be defensive in relationships or defensive with ourselves and open in relationships. The way we relate to ourselves automatically conditions the way we relate to others or the world at large.
Write Your Attitude Statement as a Comment.